Right Here
by charactersthatholdmyheart
Summary: One-shot: Maura searches for comfort after a hard day. Established Rizzles. Fluff and angst.
**A/N: I just love this little story, so thought I'd share. This will probably be a one-shot, but who knows.**

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She just wants Jane. Jane and their baby. Maura hurries out of the precinct doors, not even bothering to say goodbye to Frost and Korsak.

On the way home, she tries to shake the images in her mind of a dead mother, of her young child screaming and crying as EMTs tried to calm her down and examine her. Screaming for her mother.

Why did she have to still be on the scene when Maura arrived? She can't stop hearing those cries now.

She rushes through the front door thinking only of Jane, but she quickly turns to see that Jane's not sitting on the couch in the living room like she expected. Jane is most comfortable there with her aching back. This alarms Maura more than it should and she rushes around the door of the kitchen. No Jane. Now her heart is pounding. She turns to go check the bedroom, even though it's so early in the evening and very unlike Jane to really rest like she's supposed to. But Bass makes a sudden noise in the kitchen and she turns back to look at him.

And then next to Bass, she sees it: two feet sticking out from behind the other entranceway into the kitchen.

 _Jane._

Maura does not even have the ability to cry out or scream or let out any of the emotions of panic she is feeling. She just gets there as fast as her shaking legs can carry her.

She stops when she sees Jane. She is sitting on the floor, her legs splayed out wide, her concentration fully on Bass as she tries unsuccessfully to reach over her large pregnant belly towards him.

Maura doesn't even care about the silly position her wife is in. She just takes in the sight of Jane's lovely eyes, her steady breathing, the way she holds one hand over her stomach, the way her dark curls, always unruly, fall into her eyes.

Jane is _alive_. She is unharmed and she is so beautiful.

"Jane," Maura breathes, wanting so badly to kneel next to her, but she feels frozen in place.

Jane is very focused on the task at hand and doesn't appear to hear Maura or even see her. She has a little toy race car that she drives towards Bass. She tries to stretch further, but to no avail, and sighs in frustration. Maura continues to watch her, just needing to take in the sight of her for a minute, as Jane scoots forward with much effort. She then smiles triumphantly at being able to land the race car on Bass's shell and starts making zooming noises as she drives it over his back.

This seems to bring Maura a little bit out of her immobile state.

"Jane," she repeats, louder this time, her voice full of relief.

Jane looks up at Maura in surprise and pulls her hand back from Bass. She looks down at the ground just as quickly in shame, having been caught red-handed playing what Maura would deem "inappropriate".

"Sorry, Maur," she says quietly, weary to get the lecture about how Bass is a living creature, and not a toy.

She must have missed Maura's tone and there's no way she has looked at Maura's eyes or she would know she wasn't about to get scolded, but scooped up in Maura's arms.

Maura almost collapses to the floor next to Jane.

"Jane," she says, again and this time, Jane is paying attention.

She immediately grabs Maura's hand, her eyes full with worry.

"What happened, Maur?" Now she rakes her eyes over Maura looking for any signs of what's wrong. "Are you okay, what happened?"

Tears spring to Maura's eyes and she shakes her head, trying to will them away. She takes Jane's hand and brings it up to her cheek, holds it there. Maura closes her eyes, breathes in deeply trying to calm herself, but she can feel Jane getting increasingly more concerned.

"Maura, please," Jane practically begs, her voice soft and worried.

She normally doesn't push Maura to talk, knowing more than anyone that sometimes Maura needs space until she's ready to really put her feelings into words. But this is much more upset than Maura usually gets.

Maura tries to speak, but her throat feels tight and narrow and her words feel as big as swallows and she just can't push them up through her lips. So, instead, she gently reaches out to cradle Jane's belly.

She feels relief wash over her when the baby kicks, when she wraps Jane up in her arms and holds her. Jane hugs her back as best she can, although the embrace is slightly awkward with her large belly in between them. But for Maura it's just what she needs, just to hold her family. Her family is _safe_.

"Maura, honey," Jane breathes in her ear, and Maura can hear in Jane's voice that she is getting upset, that there are tears coming.

That happens a lot more often lately, as much as Jane absolutely despises it. Nobody dared mention the tears that sprang to her eyes when she saw TJ in his costume on Halloween.

She only lets herself really cry with Maura. In the dark of the night, while they're lying in bed she'll vent her frustrations.

 _I'm an emotional mess, Maur. A ball of feelings. Ugh, make it stop! It's just the hormones, Jane, it's normal._

Jane crying still makes Maura upset to see though. There's something unnatural about it, despite how it's typical for pregnancy, and she tries to avoid inadvertently causing any tears at all costs.

So, now hearing the tears in Jane's voice, she pulls back from the embrace and tries her best to explain.

"I'm okay," Maura says, making sure to look Jane in the eye so she truly understands. "It's alright, sweet girl."

Jane heaves a sigh of relief, and wipes quickly at her eyes, then gently cups Maura's face in her hands. "Okay, what happened, Maur. You can talk to me."

With some effort, she bends to kiss Maura on the forehead.

Maura goes to sit beside Jane, falling back against the wall and leaning her head on Jane's shoulder, suddenly weary.

"I had to perform an autopsy on a mother today. She had a daughter who was maybe five or six. She was at the crime scene and she was crying about how her mother left her. She wanted her. She wanted her to come back."

Now the words just flow. "The mother had a bullet through her chest. And she was wearing this beaded necklace that said 'Mommy'."

Jane wraps her arms around Maura, but stays silent, knowing she needs to talk right now and let everything go.

"I couldn't get the little girl's cries out of my head when I was working on the autopsy, Jane. I just couldn't-" Maura's voice breaks. Her next words are much more quiet, full of fear. "What if I lose you? I can't lose you, Jane."

"No, Maura honey, you won't, you-"

Maura breaks out of Jane's arms suddenly frantic, the fear washing over her fully.

"I can't." She's coming apart and there aren't any right words to explain. "I can't raise this child without you Jane, she needs me _and_ you. _I_ need you. Please don't ever leave me."

She curls up into herself, sobbing. Maura suddenly feels so alone and lost. Like it's already happened, Jane's already gone.

And then she feels arms wrapping around her from behind, scooping her up into warmth and safety.

"It's okay, Maur, I've got you," Jane's soothing voice in her ear.

Maura lets herself relax backwards into Jane's arms, as she lowers herself down, lying on the kitchen floor. She feels Jane lie down next to her. Maura moves to bury her face in Jane's neck and instantly feels more calm. Jane rubs circles on Maura's back, murmuring sweet words, as Maura breathes Jane in and lets the last of the tears come out.

Jane kisses her head a couple times, then takes Maura's hand and places it right over her belly.

"Feel that?" Jane whispers, as the baby kicks.

Maura rubs her hand in a soothing motion over Jane's stomach, feeling excitement and joy begin to push away the sadness that was just consuming her.

"She's saying hi to both her mommies."

Jane shifts so that now Maura's head is resting on Jane's chest, right above her heart.

"And hear this?" Jane's heart is pounding strong and constant and Maura closes her eyes, just taking the sound in.

"I'm right here, Maura. Right here, sweetheart. For you _and_ our baby."

Maura looks up at Jane and her dark brown eyes are so sincere, they hold such love.

One hand still on the swell of Jane's stomach, Maura stretches up to kiss Jane, to thank her for being what Maura always needs simply by being herself.


End file.
